Sometimes or maybe often or maybe all the time, it can be the path of least resistance to live in denial. Someone close to me has a humorous approach to this regarding their health. They live by the philosophy that as long as you are feeling well, to avoid "looking under the hood" lest you find something that cannot be ignored. Unfortunately that may have repercussions when you least expect or want it to. This anecdote may resonate with many in a high demand leadership environment. You are somewhat aware that there is a problem, but you are reluctant to address it for all kinds of reasons and the default becomes denial.
After denial wears thin, we often reach out to a trusted advisor or mentor and may get a quick fix that manages the problem of the moment for the moment. So, here is the alternative to consider that will equip you for the long run.
The process of coaching will provide the safe environment for you to take that first crucial step of facing up to uncomfortable truths about the realities that have brought you to where you do not want to be. Through reflective questioning you will gain clarity about the obstacles that have led to frustration, stagnation and repetitive cycles of failure that have prevented you from getting where you want to be.
For the reflective coaching process to create genuine value, requires whole hearted commitment This process will be a transformative experience if you accept the challenge to peel back the layers of existing perceptions about your challenges and where you fit into the narrative..
Let us look at some examples:
1. What do you perceive to be the barriers that are preventing you from getting beyond the situation you want to move on from?
This line of questioning will guide reflection into all the perceptions, fears, habits and beliefs and seek to separate perception and reality.
2. What do you see as the gap between the present and a desired future state?
This will identify the reality and nature of the gap and help to identify the steps needed and inform the development of a realistic actionable path forward. Unless we are completely honest at the front end about the issues we want to manage, there cannot be a successful end result.
3. What uncomfortable emotions are you avoiding in dealing with challenges?
Paramount amongst culprit emotions, is avoidance. Avoidance breeds procrastination and denial.
4. What do you think you need to become to get to your desired outcome?
This will facilitate exploration of the uncomfortable need to look at what we need to be to enable what we need to do.
5. What patterns are you aware of in unsuccessful attempts to effect change?
Unless one honestly faces the realties of failed attempts , you cannot plan to avoid those and history will repeat itself.
The courage to face uncomfortable truths and the discomfort that comes with that, is where growth and forward progress begins.
I encourage you to ponder these examples and I invite you to connect for a discovery call. I know first hand that leadership in health care is a difficult path to walk and that most systems are so focused on keeping the institutions running that providing a space and a mechanism to support leaders is not front of mind.
Reach out. I might just be able to help you gain a new perspective.Sometimes changing our perspective can be the tipping point towards changing our path.
Take care.
Johan
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